The New Offworld (Faction)

RandomCommander

At first, the Androids in the remains of the ship are confused at the hexagonal beam of inefficiency.
ROLD spoke first: "ERROR: I can't properly react to this."
DEUK just crossed its arms. "I probably can - Is that Portal-Hexagon trying to contact us?"
ARJT shook its head, "Negative, Portal-Hexagon is Trader-Class. This is obviously Explorer-Class, judging by its--"
"With all due respect to the Trooper droids, I do not think this is Dimensional Collective Technology."
"Then what the metaphorical hell is it?"
"My best guess is that it's-- INCOMING!"

The Androids get into whatever sort of cover they can from their exposed debris of a dropship before DEUK peeks out.

"Wait... Is it-- is HE, pardon, trying to hail us? With that... [REDACTED]-looking weapon?"
ROLD was next to peek out. "That's at least offensive to seven other races. Good thing we're not any of them..."
ARJT got curious enough to take a look. "Well, I'd say that he definitely has... circuits."
"That's the wrong kind of [REDACTED]-related insult, Argent."
"My arguement still stands, Duke. He's got the circuits to come out into OPEN SPACE, with a [REDACTED]-on-a-stick, probably the most INEFFICIENT WEAPON WE'VE SEEN SO FAR, against THREE, I repeat, THREE Armed androids of ASSAULT-CLASS."
ROLD points to U34, "He's at least intelligent enough to not attack us outright - I think we should answer his hail somehow."
DEUK, after some freak moment of thought, decides to carve something onto a piece of hull on the near-destroyed ship, dislodge it, and throw it at the Glitcher. The engraving reads, in a precise, universally-common scripture: "WHERE ARE WE?"

DocSlime

RandomCommander
Unit 34 catches the piece of the hull by poking it with his weapon. He then takes it off the weapon and tries to read whatever remained from the engraving. 34 nods and clicks something on his lance, making it project a lingering trail. It is also pink.
HELLO. YOU ARE IN OFFWORLD-HOSPITALIER SPACE. I AM OBLIGED TO ASK YOUR IN-
The weapon runs out of power, automatically holstering itself and the trail before the Glitcher can respond by writing letters. U34 facepalms and flies towards the ship, holstering the weapon in the process. The Glitcher flies close enough to brutally slam on the hull with a bit too powerful pair of magboots, most likely crushing his legs in the process as well. The boots immediately deactivate, so Unit grabs the dent left by his impact and attempts communication in Offworld-native methods, which include a very interesting form of WiFi among all others, and a hivemind-like chat between all Glitchers developed by U34 himself. Needless to say, nothing out of that works, so he tries to articulate, which is pretty hard when his legs are utterly broken and his only form of movement are rear-mounted wings, whose thrust is now off-center thanks to the legs' displacement. As so, U34 clings on the hull and sends an emergency call.
After a few minutes, another Glitcher jumps in by a small, personal FTL drive whose side effects include blood clots and occasional buffer overflows regarding coordinates near the user's limbs and other moving parts, often causing gangrene-like effects in organics and short circuits in robotics from continuous use.
"Hey, what's going on here?"
"Can't you see? I'm stuck with a bunch of armored droids here of unknown identity!"
"I see, are they-"
"Yes!"
Unit 21 immediately holsters his weapon and looks around for armed droids. He sees none, and lands on the ship with better-tuned magboots.
"Saw Hex's new leg?"
"Ah, it's majestic indeed."
"Well, you might need a pair of those in the near future, or-"
Unit 21 stands up and reaches with his arm, mocking a priest.
"Jooooin the Fraaaactaaaals!"
Both laugh a little.
"No, seriously, those legs are great. I'd like one. Can you jump me back or anything?"
"You did not order a spare drive and I did not bring one."
"Well, I suppose we'll have a friendly hug-"
"And a very unfriendly fuel bill. You know these are made for one person."
"Shut up, these guys seem to be in distress."

RandomCommander

DocSlime
ARJT analyzes the message before it abruptly cuts off, and turns to ROLD. "Offworld-Hospitalier Territory? Are they in some sort of Timeshare thing?"
Deuk facepalms "The Core-AI never really admired Offworld culture, but are we really in an instance to complain? Hospitaliers are new to me, though."
"Regardless, just about every navigation sys--"
The hard impact caused the interior to creak and shake a little, alarming the androids further.
"What is he doing now!?"
"He seems to be... having trouble boarding this ship."
ARJT unholstered its pistols in a shocked manner. "HE'S BOARDING US!?"
DEUK gave the Gunslinger-model android a look. "Possibly to assist us, you low-ping software failure!"
"I DON'T BUY IT." ARJT runs behind a charging socket for cover, pistols still drawn. DEUK and ROLD remain where they are, until U21 unexpectedly arrives. This time, ROLD gets surprised.
"WHAT!? They have Personal Transport Drives!? They could be anywhere within the ship by now!"
ROLD runs to the cockpit, DEUK tried to stop the Pilot-model android, but wasn't quick enough.
"Oh, for crying out stupid..."
DEUK casually sidestepped into a room that still had all its walls, hiding from U21's prying eyes when he looked for armed androids. He attempts to connect to the two mostly-functional androids via some head-implanted system.

DEUK - Considering the VERY LOW chance they have hostile intent, what in Effervescent-Blade's name are you planning, ARJT?
ARJT - Well, the one that jumped in recently seems to be a lot more capable than the one with the inefficient weapon, I plan to take him down first.
DEUK - How about we give them a chance to explain themselves, and we can possibly defuse this situation and get our droneship fixed?

DocSlime

RandomCommander
The Glitchers, after conversing for about a minute, finally decide to explore the shipwreck. U34 is sitting in the dent he made and waiting for U21 to settle the situation. 21 jumps only to realize that there is no sign of gravity and immediately flies towards the expected landing spot. He swiftly lands with his boots, which make a loud clank on contact with the metallic floor. Obviously, a 20 meter-long weapon is more than awkward to use in enclosed spaces, so he shortens his normal lance to about a spear's size. U21 looks around and sees a closed cockpit, and a room with structurally sound walls. The resemblance of floor he's standing on doesn't seem too safe and clogs up the boots with metal powder and small chunks that are attracted to the magnets. Trying to lift off the foot, 21 also detached a piece of metal he was standing on. The Glitcher decides to turn off the boots and use his proper back-mounted wings instead. He checks the drive's fuel and continues closer to the control room, completely oblivious of the intact room.

RandomCommander

DocSlime
U21 completely passes the nook where ARJT took cover in, allowing a clear shot for it. It almost took the shot, but stern orders in a silent, secure rift-based link from DEUK made it decide not to take it after all, silently holstering its pistols and biding its time.

The door of the cockpit seems to have a chunk missing, but it's at such an angle that it would be troublesome at U21's current angle to view through it. So he pushes off the floor with his feet and uses his wings to flip around so that he would be standing on the ceiling of the ship, but instead of standing he decides to crouch down and get a better look through the gap in the door. He sees a mess of a flight control board, the canopy is cracked in multiple places and half the controls are either broken or missing. The flight sticks are still in one piece, but mostly useless as the ship is not flight-capable anymore. A display that is relatively undamaged shows that about 70% of the ship is missing. The only notable weapon onboard this ship is a roof-mounted cannon - and it is sealed off.

The Pilot Android seems to be huddled near the very broken part of the controls, a silly-looking swiss-army wrench in one hand, and a standard laser pistol in the other. A passive scan reveals that there are two somewhat invisible auras surrounding the android - one is a deflective energy-based field and the other seems to be creating small gravitational forces pulling the android towards the floor - which from U21's point of view is currently upside down.

DocSlime

Tson
Voice turns around, his helmet shines to indicate a charged soundwave. He sees the reptile tongue and tilts his head.
"Falk? Your so-called Pope is... look for yourself."
Keys of Chaos and Conversion walks up to Adams and is shocked by the appearance of Adams.
"This? Voice, you've mistaken."
Keys touches Adams to feel if he is still channeling the Queen's signals. He does, but Keys refuses to show it and shrugs, walking away.
"Either we kill them and gear up, or find a new tank."
The eerie voice of Astrum Deus bursts out. It is furious.
"Mortals! You idiots! This is not a cooperative arena, this is a fighting arena! How stupid do you have to be?"
Another silent voice whispers something in response.
Deus rethinks his fighting arena as a result.
"Might be wise to do that."
A repair kit appears right on top of Adams. The kit contains a few wrenches of varying sizes, a pipe wrench, some nails, a stapler gun, and among everything else, a decorated key. It is golden.
"Copy that and both of your parties may get out. Or you can grab it and run away, since you're pals with each other and it's a perfect opportunity-"
Keys fires in the general direction of the voice, his bullet shaping
F OFF
Keys opens the bolt and loads another bullet directly. He still wonders what idiot designed an open-bolt gun of such caliber.

Tson

DocSlime
Steel stares incredulously at Adams, "What the f-"
Jameson: "What is wrong with your face?"
Adams looks bewildered, then horrified: "Ah, well ur, oh i guess it doesnt matter now."
he does something with a concealed stud on his wrist and the rubber skinsuit retracts into his medical backpack, the others can now see that he is covered entirely in yellowish scales, his head also is hairless and elongated a little like a snake's and he posseses a great many sharp teeth that, due to the fact of an alien physiology appear to be fixed in an eternal grin, his tongue flicks in and out of his mouth, he speaks:
"Sorry for the deception, it's just that my race is not too keen at the moment at bieng found so they sent me as a sort of scout to the inhabited regions, don't worry, i am actually a doctor, and my name is adams, or as near enough that it makes no difference"

Everyone looks at him weirdly, he picks up the toolkit:
"Well come on then, lets get cracking"

he walks toward where the other party is standing

DocSlime

Tson
The four men are startled by Adams' appearance. Saws crosses himself.
Keys is not as much surprised and is eyeing the toolkit.
"What is that thing?"

[Make up an excuse and run towards the exit]
[Show him the key]
[Try to agree on trying to replicate the key]
[Threaten and move to the exit]

"Er, brother. How do I even refer to you now?"

Tson

DocSlime
"I dont know what it is, but it's probably useful, by the way, just call me Adams, i'm kinda used to it by now."

DocSlime

Tson
"Uh-huh. Let's see what's in there."
Keys demands to hand over the toolbox.

DocSlime

RandomCommander
U21 wonders why is everything upside down. From far enough away, Unit's weapon can even be mistaken for a lightsaber if the lance length is correct. The handle is made out of lead and is decently heavy, but as hardlight has close to zero mass, the weapon is excellently balanced. The lead partially blocks radiation from the inbuilt rechargeable reactor, but the radiation levels around the handle were measured at about 2 Sv/h, and in places without direct sunlight or under the cover of atmosphere, that would certainly be told apart from background levels with pretty much any device. Unit decides to get attention and discuss the situation. He stands up from cover and slightly increases lance thickness, making it brighter.

RandomCommander

DocSlime
ROLD noticed the illumination levels have risen, but as a result he could better assess the damage. As it had surmised, the conventional wiring connected to the cartography systems on the only cockpit remaining on the ship had been cut by immeasurable force. The android carefully severed the damaged cables and reconfigured the swiss-army spanner into a sort of stylus with a welder apparatus attached. It took a small chunk of metal from the ship, jammed it into a small opening in the tool, and proceeded to "draw" a wire from one section to the other. It did this about two more times before something on the dashboard lit up.

The Pilot stood up. "I suppose I should thank you for the light... Thank you." It obviously sounds nervous, like it knows that this is a previously-detected yet still unknown entity it is talking to. Meanwhile, footfalls could somehow be heard from the structurally sound room behind U21, made clearer from the bending and creaking of unstable metal fixtures.

Tson

DocSlime
Adams: "Sure"

Steel: "Urrr..."

DocSlime

RandomCommander
Unit approaches even further and moves to the cockpit's door. He politely knocks on it, raising his hand so it would be visible through the hole in the door, signaling peace.

DocSlime

Tson
Keys grabs the toolbox. He sees the key almost immediately and shows it to the party. Voice is singing something to collect the tank debris in one pile with his sound helmet, Plates is still drumming on the rocket launcher in tune to Voice's singing, Saws is looking at Adams and barely blinking. Only Saws notices the key and shrugs.
"We could use the wrenches."
Keys takes all the tools and throws the key back to Adams. Keys then pukes some Fractality bots onto the wrenches and waits for them to transform into much better sentient wrenches that could fix the tank that Voice is assembling. One wrench is done in less than a minute, so Keys repairs the piano almost instantly with it and plays along to Plates and Voice. Plates noticed that and took out two small pipes from the tank debris to play on the rocket launcher, which sounds surprisingly much like a drum when hit.

RandomCommander

DocSlime
The other Android opens the door, the ROLD inscription now visible on its left arm. It nods and gets out of the way to allow U21 access. The footsteps draw closer until two other, much heavily armed androids walked in.
"See?" the Android with the biohazard symbols said, "They come in peace, was it so hard to notice that?"
"I will admit it was quite difficult to suppress my fight-or-flight programming" the pilot android admited.
"Argent, Help the other one out, will you?"
The android with the ARJT inscription rolled its shoulders and said in a reluctant tone: "Affirmative..."
As the Gunslinger android went outside to help U34 in, DEUK turned to ROLD. "Roald, have the ship activate personal gravity fields for our guests."
The Pilot Android started typing on a console, and U21 fell from the ceiling - though he activated his wings just in time to avoid falling on his head. When U34 was blessed with a gravity field, ARJT had to exert notable effort dragging him in, due to the damaged legs.

Tson

DocSlime
Adams does stuff, yeah, (Sorry have lost track a bit, what is the key for?)

DocSlime

RandomCommander
U34: You didn't have to.
U21: So, what exactly happened here? 34? Anyone?
U34: I've found this thing on a junk burning mission. The greens think dumping reactors into the sun is bad, so I was just about to throw it at our planet and found these guys here.
U21: That I can understand, but what do you have to say?
21 turns to the Droids.
U21: Also, excuse my friend for... yeah. That. I could say that was a glitch in the system.
U21 chuckles.

RandomCommander

DocSlime

U34: You didn't have to.

ARJT: "I still felt it was necessary."

U21: Also, excuse my friend for... yeah. That. I could say that was a glitch in the system.

DEUK's visor seems to close and open rapidly, simulating a blink, perhaps? "I get it. Glitcher-type Androids. Pun Intended."
ROLD: "I admit it was clever."
DEUK: "Let's be serious for a moment. We are the only 3 functional androids out of the 5 native to this droneship. One is literally embedded into the Reactor Core and the other's processing systems are corrupted."
ARJT: "Polter was a unique gunner android, but now he's a monster. We sealed him in the roof-mounted cannon."
DEUK: "Our Troop Transport Droneship, after a catastrophe of a mission, is only able to sustain us for so long. Roald estimates in approximately 12 third-layer cycles we WILL be junk to be burned in a planetary atmosphere somewhere."
ROLD: "I wanted to say that myself, Duke."
DEUK: "I think it is better said by someone who has proven to have a sensible logic pattern."
ROLD turns away and emits an electric growl.

DocSlime

RandomCommander
Both Glitchers look at each other, calculating possible ways to rescue the stuck droids and somehow gain from it. Energy and time aren't free, after all. U21 reaches for his pocket, but U34 almost immediately calculates a few outcomes and slaps U21 in less than half a second.
"Clever, but why did you hide it?"
"An amputee is asking questions!"
"Indeed."
U21 calculates the answer for a whopping second.
"We could have both droids resurrected, seal the reactor by channeling the bots through the stuck one, and have 2 new allies."
"Allies? You call mindless sacks of robo-rot allies?"
"Yes."
"Then the price of a whole android life-"
"They are not quite immortal as we are. Different OS."
"IT IS NOT WORTH IT ANYWAY!"
Both androids entusiastically try to slap each other, hitting each other's hands as a result.
"Plague Doctor!"
CLANG
"Pervert!"
CLANG
"Backstabber!"
CLANG
"Amputee!"
CLANG
This continues for a few seconds until U21 simply moves out of reach.
U34 unhinges one of his legs which now resembles a pancake, and tosses at 21.
CLANG
Then they proceed to exchange frisbee throws at each other's faces until 21 catches it and throws in the outer space.
Both look at each other as if their eyes shot lasers.
"Filthy rustsack!"
"Filthy nutsack!"
"WHAT?"
U34 punches the floor with enough force to be sent flying and headbutts 21.
Both move out of each other's reach and continue staring at each other.

DocSlime

Tson (Opening the door from the arena. One party that has left is victorious and then the arena is locked up for reconstruction, so leaving would mean burying the other party alive.)

Tson

DocSlime
Adams: "Hey guys, i have an idea, why don't we all leave in unison, as technically by not killing each other it could be said both teams have won."

Jameson: "Good idea"

Steel: "Agreed"